GodCoin
April 27, 2025
by William P. Meyers

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Heading to Infinite Value

Amid the hoopla about the death of Jorge Mario Bergoglio and the selection of his successor to be Pope of the Roman Catholic Church, people may have missed a critical bit of news.

The Church is about to embrace blockchain based pseudo money, the best known of which is Bitcoin. But the Church will be issuing its own coin, to be called GodCoin. The hope is to do the first issue in 2026.

According to my sources inside the Vatican, the Church has long been in a funding crisis. In the past the solution was always seen as more preaching leading to more followers leading to better funding. But Church leaders have had to admit that has not worked well for decades. Church attendance has fallen in the industrialized nations of Europe and the United States, where talking people out of a tithe (10% of income) generates good returns. Church attendance has mainly grown in Africa, which hardly generates enough income to keep the churches there going. Add to that huge settlements of lawsuits against the Church for its protection of pederast priests. Funding needed rethinking.

Young people often like Bitcoin and meme coins. These appear to generate money out of thin air. If the Church had had the foresight to buy just one million dollars ($1,000,000) of Bitcoin when it was at $1 per coin in 2010, it would be able to trade those Bitcoins in for (no kidding) 94 billion dollars ($94,000,000,000) today, 4/27/2025. Provided it did not try to sell its coins all at once, which would deflate the market, perhaps even cause a panic.

GodCoin could have, however, some special features. It would be blessed by God and the Church. Owners would be encouraged to leave their GodCoin to the Church when they die, to buy indulgences for their sins and a quick trip to heaven, without having to wait years or centuries in Purgatory. A group of theological specialists is currently deciding how much GodCoin would be needed to cancel out a given period of time in Purgatory.

When GodCoin is created the Church will keep most of it for itself, at first. We have seen how this works lately with meme coins, including those for the Trump family. Since there are a limited amount of coins on the market at any given time, as more people try to buy some coins, the price gets driven up. This creates a healthy market where some coins can be sold, converting them back into a currency that is easy to spend, like the Dollar, Euro, Yen, or Yuan. This gives people greater confidence in their decision to buy GodCoins, making them seem like an investment, rather than a scam.

Once the GodCoin is bid up, the Church can carefully sell the coins it holds, a few at a time, to shore up its own finances. Also, since good Catholics will turn over their coins to the Church when they die, the Church can control the supply on the market, set the price, and likely never run out of funding again.

I am going to buy some when available, even though I have avoided Cryptocurrency up until now. If there is one group of people I know who are easily conned, it is Roman Catholics. I will buy the coins, watch the idiots bid them up, then convert them back to dollars, for use here on earth.

After all, the Roman Catholic Bible says "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." [Don't tell Trump.] I doubt the GodCoin as payment for sins scam will trick the guardians of the gates of heaven.